In Memory Of Bailey

What a sweet boy!

Home Sweet Home Playing in the snow this year

Mike took Bailey to the Vet today and we heard the news. Bailey had severe back and spine damage. This is very common in Beagles and usually comes on very quickly. Surgery would be thousands of dollars, no guarantee that it would work and even if it did, at his age it would probably occur again. We decided to take him home and try to nurse him back to health with some help from the Veterinarian. She sent him home with Pain Killers, Muscle Relaxers, lots of information and Stool Softeners. He wasn't able to go the bathroom on his own, he had to be carried everywhere and doing so without a muzzle would cause him to get very upset.

When Mike got home, Bailey took every bit of energy he had to hop from Mike and hover in the Driver's side floor board of the car. He could hardly get him out. He was biting, crying, screaming in pain and we made the decision. We called the Veterinarian and were able to come in this afternoon. Mike and I sobbed the entire time. The Doctor was wonderful, explaining what our options were and what would happen. She said that this was the best decision and she was afraid that this was what it would come down to. We had so many emotions and didn't understand why Saturday morning he was fine. She said that, with Beagles, it can happen immediately. Once they have a back injury, it often becomes a question of life or death in a very short period of time. Sometimes, it's easier that way, sometimes it's not. We were able to stay with him through the end and after. It was heart wrenching to leave him. We couldn't stop crying. He's a part of us. And now he's gone. And we hurt.

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Never again, will he lay at the foot of our bed, happy as he can be. Never again, will he sit at our baby's door and cry when they cry, always concerned about us all.

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Never again, will he go camping with us and excitingly, jump in the car and into his crate. Never again, can he go swimming at the beach with us with his very own life jacket.

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I'll miss that one small bark as he waits at the back door to go in or out. I'll miss his adorable little face looking up at me at the kitchen table while we eat. I'll miss him shaking so silly after a nice warm bath.

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Never again, will he tilt that little face as if to listen to what I say. I'll miss him sitting as close to my feet as possible in the Den, just happy being near us.

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I love when he comes running when I call him and all I hear is his collar jingle. I'll never see him laying under our dining room table again, watching us get ready for Dinner.

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Emotions are funny. I'm so sad that he's gone my heart actually hurts. I'm mad that he was fine Saturday and now, Monday, he's gone. I want answers but I know I can't question why. I'm selfish that he's not here with me when I need him most. I'm hurt because I love him so much.

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Only God can heal our hearts and allow us to move on. I never thought you could love an animal so much. But he's not hurting now and he's at peace. We're at peace with our decision but it doesn't make it any easier. It's the hardest thing we've EVER had to do and I hope I never have to again. *

Rest in peace, Our Beloved Bailey...